It’s actually a sickening feeling at the bottom of my
stomach. Last night I kept having nightmares of being raped again so I didn’t get
much sleep at al. So this morning I was up and just not feeling like myself at
all. The nightmares’ really freaked me out. I kept having flashbacks of having the
rape kit done and I remembered exactly how it felt and how much it hurt me.
I didn’t want to talk a shower this morning. I had felt so
dirty last night that i just wanted to soak in the hot tub. I felt so used and
broke that the only thing I wanted to do was sit down and cry it all out. My vagina
was hurting. It was hurting the same way it hurt every time I was raped and touched.
The pain was still there and I couldn’t stop it. The ride to work was so much
worse, every bump in the road only made the pain 100 times worse and all I could
do was try to breathe through it.
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